Social Aspects

This topic contains 7 replies, has 0 voices, and was last updated by  DecMate 6 years ago.

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September 30, 2011 at 17:36 #668

DecMate
Participant

Hey, im currently undergoing some werid feelings. I just constantly feel self conscious when “socialising”. I often find myself judging what im saying and thinking about what they are thinking about me. I already know that staying in awareness and breaking my though down will help and i do sometimes feel fine but othertimes i’m overwealmed by a horrible energy, and no matter what i do i can’t help but feel like this.

I will go throughout my day living in surrendered awareness but as soon as i make contact with another person i feel self conscious and awkurd, and i sometimes just don’t know what to do.

I feel i already know anwsers yet cannot apply them.

E.G. if i was the one recieveing this from somone else, i would say it is your association with your thoughts that are creating this. Stay in meditative awareness and it will break down your ego.

just looking for guidence because i can’t really ask anyone else as no one i know is becoming more conscious of there subconscious mind.

October 4, 2011 at 11:56 #736

JulianY2K12
Participant

I’m pretty much the exact same way. I have no idea how to act around people so I basically have to fake a personality (which I’m not very good at).

I’m 22 now and I’ve had this problem all my life. I thought for a while that I had “social anxiety” but all the relaxation techniques I used didn’t help at all. Besides, my anxiety was caused by the fact that I was socially retarded, not the other way round.

Right now I have no idea what to do. I don’t particulary care about having friends or getting a girlfriend but getting a job is EXTREMELY stressful and I obviously need to work. Any advice here would be great.

October 6, 2011 at 05:52 #738

Kahuna a pele
Participant

Hey whats up.

First of all let me tell both of you that I had similar feelings and in fact from what I noticed almost all people do. So you are not unique in that aspect.

@ DecMate

From a spiritual perspective you will never see anything out there unless it is already in you, so you could say that other people sometimes act as mirrors in which we can look at ourselves and our own feelings and ideas. That is why sometimes our mind starts racing when we are around them. This is in fact a good thing because it makes other people almost like our helpers in the act of integrating and releasing our unconscious ( or sometimes conscious) ideas and feelings.

When we are around others we may experience social anxiety because we want to be accepted. The anxiety comes in because we feel that we are being judged. It becomes amplified when we start judging ourselves. It does not matter really why we feel that we are being judged, judging in itself is enough to create the anxiety. We become less willing interact with others and maybe sometimes we even start to believe ourselves to be socially retarded, but thankfully that is simply an idea that we are carrying around in our head. As human beings and as souls that are ultimately part of the oneness … and ultimately at one with other people too :P it is our basic nature to be social. When the ideas of limitation are removed the behavior that they have caused fades away and is replaced with a different more natural one. A behavior that just flows from our creativity, so you could even say that we reenter the flow in that aspect :P.

How I have dealt with these ideas in myself so fare is in two ways:

1) Integrate the so called “negative” emotion. Let it come up and just experience it, let it be. After a while you will notice it almost melting away. Give yourself time and just let it go as if you were letting go of a physical item. If it is still there ok, if it is gone then its ok too. Emotions are sometimes experienced for years so its ok if they don’t just melt away after one session of accepting. If any ideas come up that may be associated with these emotions deal with them in a similar fashion. Acceptance and loving oneself is key here!!!

2) Positive affirmations.

I state how I want my life to be in the present tense. Something like :”People like me from the first moment they see me, I feel at ease around them and they feel at ease around me.”

Some ideas, memories and feelings to the contrary may come up. This is ok too. Now we have a chance to become aware of some more unconscious stuff. Now it can be released too. Repeat the affirmation couple of times with strong feeling, because it is after all how you life is NOW, and thats it.

It is also very important to take action on the physical level and to allow yourself to experience these new circumstances.

I am not perfect and by no means at the end of my journey but so fare, this is the best way that I have found to deal with my emotions relating to interacting with other people. This releasing and affirming should be done on a daily basis (I sadly don’t do it every day, more like every other day or when I remember :P). But it still has helped me a lot.

A good book that I have read on the topic recently is:

Michael Brown “Presence Process”

If anyone has any pointers for me or can go deeper on what I said I would be very happy to hear it too.

October 10, 2011 at 16:25 #739

DecMate
Participant

Thanks for the advice. I feel almost completely different from i did then despite it being only a couple of weeks ago.

I have realised to a greater extent the i am consciousness and now see the thoughts which alter my perception and remain in awareness when they come and go.

Julian i have overcome this and you can too. Just realise that you are judging yourself socialising. All you have to do is give your honest expression, relax into yourself and remain aware of thoughts arising which may be saying “i shouldnt of done this or said this” because they are just thoughts, sounds within the mind which are meaningless filters.

November 4, 2011 at 09:44 #742

Jacques
Participant

I propose viewing the following video.

With English subtitles- ehttp://youtu.be/VmlGTDBdO88

With French subtitles- http://youtu.be/nLiNMBKi0ew

Love,

November 15, 2011 at 17:42 #744

Lincoln
Keymaster

When we first begin to wake up spiritually, we break the pattern of living through the subconsciously-driven ego. Whereas before we automatically acted out our thoughts, emotions and underlying personality patterns (karma), now when we are awakening we start to experience ourselves as the conscious awareness. We become the witness or watcher of the ego’s activities (feeling outside of the thoughts and emotions as they happen), rather than being “in” them as before.

In the beginning there can be a surreal experience of hyper-sensitivity because we are feeling the emotions for the first time. Before we “were the emotions” and did not have reflective-awareness of the emotions. Now we are experiencing the emotions as from outside them. This gives the emotions a new depth and intensity.

At this point, it is important to not be overwhelmed by the emotions and return to a state of personality-identification with them. Otherwise our suffering and confusion will deepen as we more fully feel pulled into the “tornado of feelings” rather than staying at the peaceful center and observing them from the witness state (awareness).

A simple breath meditation is very helpful at this point, such as this: http://channelhigherself.com/videos/satsang-with-the-self/the-sacred-breath-an-awareness-meditation/ . The breath has aspects in the physical body like the rhythmic rise and fall of the chest that will help to keep our attention centered and grounded – helping to stop the mania can happen when the mind becomes very active. Feeling the breath calms the emotional energy and chakra system, keeping out attention focused on the Anahatta Chakra (heart area) and the serene air element. Relaxing into the breath will create peace in the mind, slow the rate of thoughts and take our attention from out in the world (through the five senses) and place more of it within our self.

When interactive in the physical world, the breath awareness practice is very effective.

Blesssings and Love,

~ Lincoln

November 15, 2011 at 18:44 #745

Lincoln
Keymaster

@Kahuna a pele You gave some good advice. Thank you for sharing.

To add onto what you have already shared….

1) Staying in present moment awareness is key and cannot be overlooked or under-emphasized. We must first accept and directly experience the emotions as they arise. We must not seek to avoid the uncomfortable feelings. We must not repress them or try to get rid of them as they happen. Trying to deny what is happening will only push the emerging emotion back into the subconscious mind and prevent our learning and purification.

It can be uncomfortable to feel some emotions. But we must honor them as the form of communication that they are. Our “inner child” or subconscious mind is communicating to us what is inside of us – what beliefs and behaviors are being held as patterns in our mind / ego (karma).

Whenever these emotions arise it is an opportunity to purify them. Stay in awareness, but do not identify with the emotions. Just feel them from the awareness and watch them – trying to understand why this karmic pattern is within you. You may have inner visions of memories or a person. This is you seeing some aspects that are keeping this pattern active in you.

By staying in awareness you will realize that your fear about the emotions – fear of death, loss of control, diapproval by others, etc. – is unfounded. The emotions will pass and you will see that you fear about the emotions was worse than the emotions themselves. You will see how the fear caused you to hold onto the emotion and not allow it to be fully experienced and expressed.

Then by loving yourself – actually generating the energy of Unconditional Love from your Spiritual Heart – you will:

a) forgive any blame or shame held within yourself for the emotion

b) release your fear about the emotion

c) accept yourself just as you are, honoring the wide variety of human experience

d) create more peace within

We begin with awareness and end with integration in Love.

There are many methods / ways to work with the emotions. This is the way that the Higher Self shares with me.

2) The effectiveness of affirmation is largely due to the emotional energy that we generate when stating the affirmations. We must believe that which we are affirming. We must feel the emotion associated with the affirmation that are reinforcing. So if we affirm “I am Love” then we must generate the emotion of love within ourselves while we affrim. If we affirm “I am healthy” then we must feel the energy of what health means to us, such as happy, envigorated, and peaceful. If we affirm “I am effectively communicate myself to others” then we must feel the throat charka area and create the feelings of confidence and happiness. Etc, etc.

The more we can make this a multi-dimensional experience (mind, emotions, chakras, etc) the more effective the affirmation will be.

November 16, 2011 at 20:14 #746

keenen
Participant

Ask God and your Angels to remove anything that should not be there. There has to be something there that is making you all feel this way.

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